Transitions in early childhood can be a difficult time for our littles and can sometimes result in challenging behaviors. Transitions occur any time children move from one activity to another. Moving from playtime to cleanup or dinner time to bath time are just a few examples of transitions in a typical daily schedule but they can also involve activities happening on the move like leaving the library to go to the grocery store. In today’s post I am going to discuss why our littles have such a tough time with transitions and then give a few strategies to help you and them move throughout the day with a bit more ease.
Why Children Struggle with Transitions
For the most part, children tend to struggle with transitions because they are tired, hungry, or they simply aren’t ready to leave the current activity. I mean, think about it. Even as an adult, I struggle with any activity when I am tired or hungry and there are definitely times when I would much rather spend 30 more minutes in Target than go to the post office to ship packages that I need to send out. We have to remember that children struggle with the same things we do, they just might show their frustration through a temper tantrum while we complain to our friends about how much adulting sucks.
These challenging behaviors that happen with transitions can also be the result of a lack of language skills. This is why you see more tantrums in young children than you do in teenagers and young adults. Young children without developed language skills aren’t able to express with their words why they feel frustrated or even that they are upset in the first place, so they use the only form of communication they know: crying and screaming.
Strategies to Help Children with Transitions
While transitions might seem like a silly thing to stress about in such a busy day with your little, the goal is the make the day stress-free for both you and your child. I mean, if you could prevent your child’s meltdowns in the middle of the store you would want to, right? So let’s get into some preventative strategies you can use as well as a few simple skills to teach your little to help them during transitions.
Preventative Strategies
Create Predictable Routines – Implementing a consistent daily schedule has so many benefits but it can definitely help with difficult transitions. When children know their daily schedule and routines, they are much more prepared for the day ahead and tend to stress less about moving from one activity to another.
Make Kid-Friendly Schedule – Visuals are always a great way to create independence with the daily schedule and routine. Creating a simple daily schedule with clear pictures that can be changed out if necessary is a great way for your little to take ownership of their day.
Use Warnings and/or Countdowns – Giving your little a verbal reminder that you will need to leave an activity will help them mentally prepare for the transition. If you simply tell them it’s time to leave without any warning, then they won’t be prepared to complete their current task or leave it without being able to finish. This is one of the best ways to reduce challenging behaviors with transitions.
Keep Materials Handy – If car rides are difficult after leaving an activity that your little really enjoyed, then keep a few simple materials close by to help ease their stress. My mom always kept a small coloring book and a container of colored pencils in the back seat of her minivan, because I loved to color and draw and it was a great way to keep my mind off of any frustration during a transition.
Make It Fun – Keeping transitions light and fun is a great way to reduce challenging behaviors. Maybe next time you are finishing your bath, your little can fly like a superhero to the bedroom to get changed into their pajamas.
Skills to Teach
Think About Areas of Struggle – Identifying specific parts of your little’s day that tend to be consistently challenging is important to help them learn strategies and skills to cope. For example, if your child struggles to put their coat on before going outside because they aren’t good at getting their arms through the sleeves, then you can practice tricks to help them put on their coat independently. I suggest practicing this skill in a fun setting and not during the time they need to quickly put on their coat. We don’t want to stress them out by rushing them to be better.
Naming Emotions – When children are able to identify the ‘why’ behind their emotions, it can be easier to talk about it and move forward. This is a learned skill and children will need prompting when they are younger to help them identify what emotion they are possibly feeling. Then when they are old enough, you have given them the skills to identify the emotion on their own.
Encourage Problem Solving – Transitions can be a great way to encourage problem solving skills with your little. For example, if you have to wait in the lobby at the doctor’s office you could ask them (prior to entering the setting) to help you come up with a few ideas for what activities they could do quietly while they wait to see the doctor.
Use First, Then Language – When discussing the upcoming events for the day or even during your daily schedule and routine, it is helpful to use ‘first, then’ language. Just like a visual schedule, this type of language helps prepare your little for what is to come so they are better prepared for the change of activities.
When All Else Fails, Ask for Support
At the end of the day, children need individualized support and if none of the strategies listed above are helpful to ease the stress of transitions then I urge you to reach out for support from teachers and other early childhood specialists. And as always, I am happy to help in any way that I can so please don’t hesitate to leave a comment below or email me. Now let’s go crush some transitions!
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